However, I wanted to make something delicious that lived up to the catchy name in my mind.
My Incorrect, But Delicious, Version of Red-Eye Gravy
Fry together in skillet:
1-2 slices bacon, chopped
1/2 onion, chopped
Add and stir until browned:
2 Tbsp. flour
Pour in, while stirring, over low heat:
1 1/4 cups tomato juice
Stir continuously, except for when you add:
1 Tbsp. blackstrap molasses
a little hot sauce
Stir and stir until thickened, several minutes (if you warm up the tomato juice first, this makes it faster). Taste. When I was done, I couldn't identify "molasses" and "spicy" per se, but the gravy was rich and bright. It's possible you may need to add salt (although be careful as some tomato juice and some bacon would be salty enough).
Serve over hot, split biscuits or crispy fried potatoes for an excellent breakfast on a cool morning. Eat a biscuit and honey for dessert.